04/07/2025
By Pastor Vinnie Cappetta
"Living Proof: Forgiveness That Marks a Changed Heart"
(1 John 3:14–19)
We talk a lot about what it means to be a Christian—reading the Bible, going to church, praying, even serving. And those things matter. But in 1 John 3, God gives us something even more basic: the way we love and forgive each other is one of the clearest signs of whether or not we actually belong to Him.
John says, “We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love the brethren.” Not we hope, not we think, not we’re trying really hard. We know. This is how we know we've been changed—because we love the people of God.
Real love for fellow believers isn’t a personality trait. It’s not just about being kind or polite. It’s a spiritual marker. When the Spirit of God comes to live in us, He gives us the ability to love and forgive people we couldn’t on our own. That love is one of the evidences that we’ve moved from spiritual death into real life.
And John doesn’t let us stay vague or surface-level. A few verses later, he says, “Whoever does not love abides in death. Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.” That’s direct. He’s not talking about physical violence—he’s talking about the kind of hatred that lets bitterness grow, that refuses to forgive, that holds onto offense like a prize.
So we have to ask: Is there someone I claim to be a brother or sister in Christ, and yet I still hold something against them? Have I written someone off because of how they hurt me, or disappointed me, or failed me?
Let’s be honest—some people are hard to love. Some wounds cut deep. But the call of Christ isn’t based on how we feel—it’s based on who He is. And He didn’t just love us when we were lovable. He loved us when we were enemies. That’s the pattern. That’s the standard.
John also brings it into everyday life: “By this we know love, that He laid down His life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.” That’s what love looks like—not just words, but sacrifice. Not just talk, but action.
And in case we’re tempted to make that abstract or heroic, he makes it real simple: “If anyone has this world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?”
This isn’t about saying you’d take a bullet for someone—it’s about not turning away when they’re hurting. It’s about buying groceries when someone’s struggling. Making the phone call when someone’s lonely. Stepping in, even when it’s inconvenient or uncomfortable.
That’s what love looks like. That’s what forgiveness does. It moves toward people. It lays down pride. It gives up the right to be right. It reflects the heart of Jesus.
So let me ask plainly: Are you loving like that? Is your life marked by a pattern of forgiveness and sacrificial love? Or is there someone you’ve written off, someone you’ve kept at a distance, someone you refuse to let off the hook?
This passage is not about earning salvation. It’s about examining whether salvation is real in you. And one of the clearest ways you can tell is how you respond when someone wrongs you. Do you move toward them in love—or away from them in bitterness?
If the Holy Spirit is putting someone on your heart right now, don’t push that away. Deal with it. Ask God for help. Take a step toward them. Forgive. Let go of the grudge. Love in truth—not just in words.
And if you read this and you’re not sure where you stand with God—if you don’t know whether you’ve passed from death to life—this is a good time to talk to someone. Don’t wait. Don’t just assume you’re okay. Ask God to show you the truth. And if you’re not right with Him, turn to Jesus. He’s ready to forgive you—and He’ll teach you how to forgive others.
Reflection Questions
- Is there someone you need to forgive today?
- Is your love showing up in real action, or is it mostly just words?
- Are you more interested in being right, or being like Jesus?
- Can you see evidence in your life that you've passed from death to life?
Prayer
Father, thank You for loving me when I was hard to love. Thank You for forgiving me when I didn’t deserve it. Help me do the same for others. I don’t want to hold onto things that You’ve already died for. I want to live in a way that shows I belong to You. Teach me to love in action. Teach me to forgive from the heart. If there’s anything in me that’s not from You, deal with it. I want to walk in the light. I want to be like Jesus. Amen.
